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The Secrets to Raising a Smarter Child
- By Inderbir Sandhu, Ph.D


~ B R A I N Y - Z I N E ~

" Learn How to Nurture A Smarter Kid "

Volume #6   Issue #10

ISSN: 0219-7642    Jan 20, 2008

Andrew Loh, Publisher

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I want to share with you an inspirational short story by Amber Thomure:


In life we all learn to walk and talk, we struggle to survive. To learn to live though is another atter. We tend to acquire that knowledge the hard way. I realized this when my father died. I wanted to do so much more with him and now that I see how short life is, I understand the importance of putting first things first. I have chosen to live life as a participant, not a spectator; my first experience with death actually taught me how to live.

I can recall the day clearly; it was August 27th, 1991. It was a beautiful bright sunny day just outside of Sacramento, California, my father and I spent his last day alive at the State Fair. We were there all day long, from open to close. We did everything we could: saw all the exhibits, rode all the rides, played all the games and of course ate our fair share of cotton candy and snacks. Towards the end of the day he was getting tired and slowing down. At the time I really didn't think much of it, we were both wearing thin. Now of course I realize what was happening, he was starting to have a heart attack.

Once we got home I was out like a light, but before I fell asleep I remember thinking that this was the best day of my life. I was definitely "Daddy's Girl" and that day I had him all to myself, something that was very rare. That was the last night for many years I could fall asleep feeling like everything in my life was okay and all was well in the world. I was young, just thirteen years old, I was naive and my father was my personal hero. I had no idea something like that would or even could ever happen to me, or to him. As a child I lost my father and he lost his life. I was of course devastated when my mother woke me up in the wee hours of the morning to tell me the news.

The next few years were difficult; my entire world had been shredded, torn apart and turned upside down. My mom and I ended up moving, her to Arizona and me to here, there and everywhere. I stayed with friends and acquaintances, I felt isolated for quite some time. There were no more fair days, no more piggy back rides, no more "Daddy's Little Girl". I turned to my family and faith for guidance and support. Although it was a fight I ultimately learned that living is more important than surviving.

As adults it's easy to miss out on life, at least the part that matters. Jobs, problems, or whatever the pressing issues of the day are, can easily overshadow what matters most to us. Things like family, friends and our own happiness are often neglected or pushed to the back burner. We say we want to spend time with the people we love, so then why don't we? Why is it that we spend our time on other things? Imagine that you are sick, really sick, would the world keep going? Then what if you took a vacation day every once in awhile, would everything really fall apart? Of course the world would keep turning; the reality is, the world will keep going once we are gone. We all have to find time to turn off our cell phones and really be there for each other, to live.

It took me many years and a lot of soul searching to come to this point, but my personal mission statement is "I will not just survive, I will live". That same statement will mean a variety of things to other people, but here's what it means to me. Buy the perfect dress, eat ice cream for breakfast, go on the trip of a lifetime. Just stay true to yourself and focused on what matters most , it does not mean is to be irresponsible or live each day as if were your last. We all have bills to pay and responsibilities to meet. However, there are ways of enjoying life and still meeting your obligations. Be the first one to jump in the pool, sing karaoke in front of your friends, just live your life so you don't look back and say I wish I would have done more, or I missed out. Just getting the most out of life, to me that is truly living.

The way I see it is, the smallest tasks can be the greatest gifts. We can decide that everyday is valuable and treat it so. Routine jobs can be thought of events, things like grocery shopping or driving to work can be looked at in a positive way. We can sing in the shower, we can have a blast making dinner, its all in our perspective and how we choose to live.

I am married now and my husband and I have a son together, we both want him to be able to look back at his childhood and know that he was important. We work at spending time together, and by spending I don't mean in the sense that "Time is Money" because its not. It's much more valuable than that. We make a point do things as a family, whether it's a vacation to Hawaii, a trip to the circus or just watching TV we do it together. I believe that we show him our love, by enjoying the simple things with him, through our actions not only our words.

We were all born and will all die, the question is what will happen in between. Will you simply walk or will you skip and dance? Will you only talk or can you listen and sing? Will you survive or will you live? My father may not have had a long life, but he lived!


Thought for today:
"If you observe a really happy man you will find him building a boat, writing a symphony, educating his son, growing double dahlias in his garden. He will not be searching for happiness as if it were a collar button that has rolled under the radiator. " - W. Beran Wolfe

Best Regards,
Andrew Loh
Andrew Loh
Publisher & Editor, BrainyZine
andrew @


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Web's Best Brain Games


Raising Self Reliant Children: Tips and Suggestions

When a kid leads a self-reliant life, he or she is able to think and act for self and for own good. With positive quality of self reliance, he or she can also trust his or her own sense of judgment and later introspect on various aspects of life. Find tips and suggestion on how to build self-reliant on your children here.

Golden Tips to Make Your Child Self-Reliant

Every parent aspires to make his of her kid self-reliant and self sufficient in the life. A kid who is self-reliant is always self-sufficient and independent, is capable enough to think and act on his or her own initiative, is ready to take simple risks and becomes successful in solving intricate problems, rather than needlessly fret over them. Read more here.


Raising Everyday Heroes: Parenting Children to be Self-Reliant
By Elisa Medhus, M.D

Written for parents, teachers, counselors and everyone else involved with raising children, this book emphasizes the need for kids to learn to make smart decisions in the face of today's permissive culture and strong peer pressure.

Many parents go to great lengths to protect their children from dangerous influences, boredom, want, and even the consequences of the kid's own choices, but Elisa Medhus- winning author of the 2002 Parent's Choice Award and National Parenting Publication Award-believes this doesn't allow kids to develop the skills they need to be successful adults.

She tells readers how to give their children opportunities to overcome adversity while still in a loving family environment, so they can develop internal wisdom, creative problem solving skills, and basic common sense.


It's Not That Complicated: The Twenty Rules for Raising Happy, Self-Reliant Children
By Doug Peine

While standing in the checkout line at one of the nation's largest discount stores, author Doug Peine observed the antics of a toddler defying his exasperated mother by refusing to put back a candy bar and throwing an all-out temper tantrum. It is a scene played out in stores and homes all across America everyday: children manipulating their parents who haplessly try to fix the behavioral problems with misguided attempts at discipline culled from an endless parade of "experts".

In this simple but eloquent book, Peine shows readers that, in spite of vast wealth of knowledge on child-rearing and child psychology, parents are more confused than ever because much of the material is too complicated and often contradictory.



For little ones, it's anything but brain food Jan 07, 2008

Small children who eat more than one serving a fortnight of certain types of fish are at risk of developing severe learning and behavioural difficulties that could lead to autism, doctors warned yesterday.

A study has found that children under the age of six who regularly eat large, predatory fish, such as shark (which is sold as flake), catfish, snapper or barramundi often have mercury levels up to seven times the safe maximum, which can lead to aggressive and regressive behaviour.

Soot from traffic exhaust lowers IQ
ITWire Jan 11, 2008

They found that the intelligence quotient (IQ) of children living in areas with more traffic fumes level had IQs, or intelligence levels, which were three points below that of children living in areas with less exhaust fumes. The children were given two intelligence tests: The Wide Range Assessment of Memory and Learning and the Kaufman Brief Intelligence Test.

Gaming makes young kids dumber
iTWire - Australia Jan 14, 2008

According to this report from a special think tank summit was held to discuss the effect on young brains by exposure to electronic games and gadgets. The "Technology industry experts" who gathered to discuss the issue arrived at the conclusion that kids should not be exposed to such devices and games until they are at least seven.

They're No Baby Einstein's
News Week Jan 14, 2008

Now that your children are back in school, there is something you should know. I'm afraid your kid isn't a genius! Chances are he or she isn't even gifted. Don't feel bad. By the most generous definition, only about 5% of kids can be considered gifted according to educators. Even fewer rate as actual geniuses; those sticklers at MENSA accept only those people whose IQ puts them in the top 2 percentage of population. So, let us face the truth: 95% of our kids are not gifted.

Clever and cleverer
Guardian Unlimited Jan 6, 2008

Are people smarter than they used to be? In the sense that we are more capable of handling the logic of hypotheticals, yes.

Parenting Pick Eaters
Your Kids Jan 09, 2008

Tempting the taste buds of your children can be challenging, but not impossible. If you have a child who is a picky eater, crying can be the main dish while screaming is the desert. Some parents don't know they are the culprits responsible for feeding their frustration. Here are some helpful hints when it comes to dinner time which might make it easier to swallow. It is OK to be choosy! Researchers who study picky eaters say that pickiness is found in every culture and in at least 25 to 30 percent of families.


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