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The Secrets to Raising a Smarter Child
- By Inderbir Sandhu, Ph.D


Developing Child Independence Thinking Skills

By Andrew Loh

Critical independent thinking skills are very important for your children. These important skills can enhance self-esteem and promote an ability to meet any challenging situation with ease and optimism. However, as parents we can hinder our children's ability to develop independence thinking skills, by helping or doing more than they actually need. Sometimes, we may even never realize that we are actually doing all the work for them. In life, parents just love their children and they want to take care of their children in every possible way. However, parents may also forget that going all the way to help their children, may actually hinder their children's ability to develop independence thinking skills.

One of the primary goals of parents is to help children develop the intense desire and ability to think on their own and without other's help. Independent thinking is the desire or wish of a person to convince him or her that the information and detail being presented is true, worthy or reasonable.

Why attitude of independence is important for your children? A child who develops independence thinking skills will always feel more confident about themselves and their ability to solve intricate life problems, especially when you are not there. You children will feel on top of the world, when they work on their own and without your help. They will also show a heightened enthusiasm to work more to achieve minor goals and objectives. Just think how your children will be excited, when they learn to wear their socks or zip up the jacket for the first time, without any help from you! Just by doing these simple things, they feel so proud of their ability to do things on their own.

Developing independence skills will provide a number of benefits to your children such as:

  • A steep rise in confidence level and self-esteem

  • An ability to solve problems those occur in daily life

  • Developing compassion and love for others

  • An ability to help others, when they are facing problem

  • Better self-image and enthusiasm

When children feel that they can do things on their own, they will also naturally want to learn and master new skills or solve intricate problems. For example, a child who has repeatedly worked on buttoning her blouse and who finally does it without her parent's help will naturally demand to try to wear that blouse all by herself without help from anyone. Alternatively, a boy who has repeatedly tried to tie his shoelace and who finally does it without his parents' help will start trying to slip them with self-effort.

You feel normally excited and thrilled, if your children are learning all things with their own initiatives. This is what most parents expect from their children too. Obviously, parents also want their children learn new things, skills and abilities on their way to adulthood. However, these events may happen, only when parents provide their children an opportunity to try to do things on their own. In nutshell, you may need to encourage independence in your children by watching patiently, when they try to button their shirts on their own even if they take many minutes. If you lose your patience at this critical juncture, you will probably hindering or preventing your children from learning important independence thinking skills. If you observe that your children are failing in their act of learning new skills, you may need to encourage them to try again, instead of helping your children with your own efforts.

Independence skills are practical life skills. These skills can easily assist your children develop confidence, feel less scared or nervous and eventually face any situations that are likely to be encountered at school and public places. Regardless of what children demand or they feel need, parents may need to train them in acquiring critical independence thinking skills and responsibilities. Mind you, it is a lifelong commitment that might be difficult to achieve and satisfy.

Not all children succeed in learning these skills. There could be many reasons for this perceived failure. Development milestones are not similar among all children. Some of them may show keenness to learn independence thinking skills at an early age, while others may take some more time to learn them. Whatever the case, parents will need to give enough opportunities for their children to learn these skills at an early age. Cleaning up rooms, tables, helping parents' finish house chore and getting ready for the school are some of the most important independence skills that your children can learn. Today, families around the world are busier than ever. Parents also feel bad about not giving enough time for their children. When parents use the available time by working with their children, they can easily teach very important lessons about independence and responsibility. Continue to read Teaching Your Children Independence Thinking Skills - How Parents can be Proactive in Training their children.


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